'This is the distance and this is my game face'

Looking back upon the sweetness,
Though I know it was sour.
I throbbed beneath my clothes,
But my smile could whisper lies.
Now she is gone.
I cannot see in front of me,
My only view is rear.
So I close my eyes, tighter now,
Till the blood boils and bursts.
I'll trap my tears.
Stop kissing my heart, please,
It just feels too good.
You prick and burn and steal it all,
You are the thief to whom I'm paralysed.
I cannot fight.
Your pernicious beauty permeates,
Swallows my vision, numbs my taste.
I reach into the darkness,
And grasp the fluttering fear.
I'm bleeding water.
Kiss me. Kiss me. Kiss me.
I beg of you, endeavor!
My voice ruptures with desperation.
Save me. Save me. Save me.
By doing nothing at all?
I am numb and losing faith,
Of every second, every day.
Is she worthy? Is she sweet?
Is she worth more to you than me?
Who is she?

I miss you, so.
Chin up.