Traded in.

There's a snapshot in my mind,
Moving stills of that night,
In the chaos I ignore it but
When all is still, it flickers,
Just jigsaw pieces in my hands
Like polaroids of lustful lies,
They hum as they flash, flash,
Flash such clarity, how can I see
Something so clearly, that my
Eyes never witnessed? Well,
My heart plays it on loop,
You can't see, my spirit hovering
Outside the realms of time
I see your pouted lips, pressed
Upon something you've wanted;
Always wanted chestnut locks
Haven't you, my handsome?
Superficial it may be, you cannot say
It isn't me. I don't believe you.

I told you so.

I will only ever be a stepping stone,
Never the destination.

Near death experience.

So, this is a broken heart.
I'm glad you got a beautiful one.
I was never enough.
So, this is a broken heart.
It makes me scared of myself.
I wonder what I might do...

Long for me.

My milky yearning for you is always growing:
Longing for a subtle touch of soft skin, smooth
My locks from my rosy cheeks, press your lips
Cool against mine, so sultry, dusty pink with
A shimmer of sunshine in your eyes, count
Every pearl around my neck, know them all
By name, like the stars in the sky, whisper to the
Moon your secrets of daylight rainbows, fall
Deeper, into the echo of my eyes, bouncing
Lightly in the nooks and crannies of me, remember
The pastel colours as I blink away your
Gaze, scramble for the caramelised wonder of
Essence never sought before, virgin to the
Love for who I am inside, dribbled words like
Honey from your tongue, that traces every line,
Twirling along pure pathways, never seen before,
Steps never danced before, shower you in glitter
Like a thousand diamonds; this is my love,
This my longing: you long for me.

Ebbs and Flows

Life is a wispy one,
a hollow she, filled by you,
filled by me.
She ebbs and flows
so cautiously, to and fro
and inbetween.
She is the tide,
twirling from the hovering heart
that is the moon,
a beckoning and ushering
of everything, yes
everything you see.

Your outstretched arms retract
when one draws closer,
quite naturally.
But with such grasp comes freedom,
when in hold, may you see,
though you may leave,
and I may miss you,
it's all relative, in such beauty.
For if you should never leave,
then I should never know,
how wonderful,
how magical,
how imperfect, dear,

you are.

At the end of the rainbow...

I can see the rainbow from where I stand,
Shivering in the heat of your absence,
With your floral promise in my hand, so ready,
Ready to blossom with the spring, I grasp,
Grasp you tightly with my heart, with a
Stubborn sort of beauty, I cling, holding you
By letting go, twirling to the pot of gold,
The lovely little lady in me, fluttering for
The spice of life, of love, of secrets never told.
I hope you feel this too.

No 'L' word.

I like to be alone with you,
To hold your hand in our special way,
Kissing your little words,
The ones that untangle my knotted heart,
Hearing your heart beat soft;
I don't need to listen very hard,
As our worries float above our heads,
For moments just in the space,
Without the dissonant philosophy,
Or simple misunderstanding,
Falling into you, contently,
Smelling your aura of uncertainty,
So familiar to the voices in my head,
Sharing your wonder of the world,
The way we do, you know?
I like to be alone with you.

Shipwreck?

So this monster with the orbs of green
More fatal than it once did seem,
Contagious leaking yellow veins,
Numeric dominance still reigns,
Go forth and feed the biting jaw
Hot, sweaty air that will allure
Questions to soothe a burning heart,
Pacified not by truth for start,
I know not of the feeling 'still'
Echoing, so sweet and shrill:
Am I the rescue or lost at sea?
Am I goal over obstacle or is obstacle me?